Some of you already know of my ongoing battle with the local squirrel population. For those of you who don’t, here’s the story:
I live in a second-floor condominium in a complex which has some very nice landscaping surrounding it. There are many squirrels in the area, which adds a nice little touch of nature whenever I walk or look outside. Unfortunately, it seems over the past two years those little touches of nature have decided to touch me, or more accurately, touch my balcony.
Okay, I’ll put a finer point on it: they’ve decided to use my balcony as their personal “comfort station.”
They do this is by climbing up on the brick wall, moving to the railing, then winding up at point x then launch, following with a landing on my balcony at point y. From there, they wreak their rodental havoc on my balcony and, when they’re feeling particularly artistic, they climb on my screen and decorate my patio window.

When this first started, I searched the internet for “squirrel problem on condo balcony” and came up with nothing. There were a lot of tips on how to keep critters out of your garden, but nothing for condo dwellers. I had to figure out a way of fixing this on my own.
I didn’t want to injure the animals, so the first thing I did was scare them off every time I saw them on the balcony with various noises and harmless implements like squirt guns. The approach worked for about two minutes, as these techniques made them come back even sooner, like a one year old in a tournament of “peek-a-boo” with Uncle Steve. Time for another approach.
I went to my local Ace Hardware and bought something called Shake Away, which is powdered fox, bobcat, and coyote urine. I sprinkled this stuff at the squirrels’ entry point (y) and waited. I didn’t see any trace of squirrels for a few days, and then one day immediately after I put an application down, one of my little neighbors hopped up, walked through the powder, and did its thing right in front of me.
I fired off an email to Shake Away’s manufacturer and received a response immediately from one of their customer service people. She was very apologetic and offered to send me a new can of the stuff, and explained that when squirrels get scared, their instinct is to climb up, and my balcony is the most convenient exit path from the patio of the people below me.
While I waited for my new can of Shake Away to show up, I told some friends about this and got suggestions that ranged from a large rat trap to various sorts of BB and pellet guns. The common theme was that I shouldn’t get a live trap and take it to the forest preserve, because I’d get fined by the county; I’d get in less trouble for killing them than relocating them.
The next can of Shake Away showed up, and man, was it fresh. I sprinkled it in the usual spot and reapplied it as suggested, every couple of days. It seemed to slow down the visits, but once again I saw one of the squirrels hop up, sniff and walk right through it, walk to the middle of my balcony, and do its thing.
Time for another solution, this one called Hot Pepper Wax Animal Repellent, which seemed like another environmentally-safe, humane approach to take. It seemed to work for a couple weeks, and then…
Yeah, you know the rest of this story.
I was about to head over to the local Bass Pro Shop for a bottle of bear urine (hey, if they’re not scared by foxes, bobcats, or coyote, I figured I’d just keep going up the food chain until I found one that worked) when Lisa suggested that some sort of barrier might work.
I thought of that before, but every option seemed like something the squirrels would get around: they’d climb on any kind of metal mesh or screen. Lisa suggested something slippery and non-climbable. Then the word “Plexiglas” came up.
Brilliant. They couldn’t climb on it, and if we did this right you wouldn’t even be able to see it without looking for it. A few bucks at Menards later, this is what we came up with:

Can you see it? I know– pretty cool.
What we did was cut a piece of plexiglas to fit the area of the railing, drilled holes in strategic locations, and fastened it to the railing with cable ties. Installed, it’s almost invisible. Now I’m waiting to hear the “thud” of a nearsighted squirrel.
This seems to be the answer so far, at least for the three hours it’s been up. I’ll let you know if this moment of brilliance solves the problem.